Anti-Celebrity Gossip Corner

Living as we are in an age of celebrities-uber-alles, I take great comfort in the most useless instances of name-dropping and celeb spotting.

I have once spoken to Morrissey. I said "'Scuse Me." He was standing in front of me at a gig.

I've emailed Mo Tucker of the Velvet Underground to tell her that her website had an error on it. She emailed me back. "Thanks."

Feel free to add your own stories. On no account must they be interesting or impressive.

Thing is, I'm outdone by magazines and gossip columns who actually print such accounts as entertaining and revelatory. For example, "Spotted: Dale Winton in a road, yesterday". That sort of thing. It's beyond parody.

Heat Magazine is a trashy and fun magazine that I shamefacedly confess to enjoying. But it does have an irritating habit of extending its net of celebrity definition a little too far. They recently published a two-page photo spread on Radio 1 DJ Dave Moyles spotted having a cigarette outside Broadcasting House, his place of employment. It was the photos that got me. What is the reader's reaction meant to be? Surprised? Impressed?


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